Felony Friday: 3 Felony Follies That Might Surprise You

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This week’s installment of Felony Friday will be a bit different from the usual format. Normally in this space I focus on one event that led to a felony charge and then provide an in-depth analysis from a libertarian perspective.This week we’ll be looking at three separate felonies. However, these crimes are a bit different than the stories I normally cover. The crimes in this article could be categorized as felony follies.Without further ado let’s dig into our content. Today we'll cover individuals who were charged with a felony for tipping over motorcycles, spreading deodorant on a prison cell floor, and running onto Wrigley field during a Cubs game.Kirkland man arrested on felony charge in motorcycle tippingRaise your hand if you knew tipping over a motorcycle could result in a felony criminal mischief charge.An Upstate New York man learned the significant ramifications associated with a little “cycle tipping” after a night of drinking at the bar.From the Utica Observer-Dispatch:

A Kirkland man was charged with felony criminal mischief for tipping over two motorcycles in May, Oneida County sheriff’s deputies said.Joshua Harris, 39, was charged with felony criminal mischief in the third degree for an incident outside Scooter’s Bar in the town of Forestport, deputies said.

If tipping over motorcycles is a felony, then is knocking over bikes or mopeds a felony as well or does the law discriminate against the size of the object being tipped over?  Is the jail sentence half as long for a unicycle? Inmate to face felony charge for intentionally applying deodorant to cell floorApparently, if you’re fresh out of banana peels, then deodorant can also cause a cartoon-like slip and fall. A prison guard in Indiana learned this the hard way when an inmate greased up his cell floor, then caused a scene to entice the guards to come running in.The Journal Gazette reports:

Short started to yell as he kicked and hit the the jail cell door, which prompted jail staff to enter his cell, according to the probable cause affidavit filed Friday.A confinement officer entered the cell to restrain Short, but the officer instead slipped on a substance on the floor and fell on the steel jail toilet, suffering injuries, the report said.Police reviewed a copy of the surveillance video from Short’s cell and discovered that he smeared a stick of deodorant on the floor, according to the affidavit.The report said the deodorant was provided to him by jail staff.The surveillance video reportedly shows Short checking to see whether the floor is slippery; then he avoids the area so he doesn’t fall, police said.

I’m guessing the body odor in this particular prison has gotten significantly worse since the incident.Man charged with felony after running onto Wrigley FieldHave you ever thought about running on the field during or after a sporting event?Well think again, because one bad drunken decision could ruin your life!The Chicago Sun Times has the scoop on a Cubs fan who ran onto the field during a game last Sunday:

Christopher Hilton, 27, is charged with one felony count of criminal trespassing in a place of public amusement, according to Chicago Police.Hilton, of the 9800 block of West Garden Court in Schiller Park, was intoxicated and ran onto the field during the game at 3:25 p.m., police said.Wrigley security tackled Hilton and Chicago Police responded and took him into custody.

I understand the intent of the charge is to deter people from running onto the field during games, but a felony is a tad excessive. This poor guy made a mistake in his 20s that will likely haunt him for the rest of his life.While each of these crimes violates the rights of other individuals and certainly should be viewed as criminal acts, a felony charge  is far too harsh. The contrarian may claim that these three men will likely strike a plea deal and have the charges reduced, but this does address the root of the issue. In a civilized society it is essentially that laws are fair and enforced uniformly across the population. Over charging for petty crimes and reducing at a later time only serves to confuse.Check out the full archive of Felony Friday!The Lions of Liberty are on Twitter, Facebook & Google+Check out our YouTube Channel!Receive access to ALL of our EXCLUSIVE bonus audio content – including “Conspiracy Corner”, “Degenerate Gamblers” and the “League of Liberty Podcast” by joining the Lions of Liberty Pride and supporting us on Patreon!Join our Facebook Group: The Lions of Liberty Forum

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Lions of Liberty Podcast Ep. 139: Seamusin Reilly - Discovering Natural Law